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Thread: There's A Chinese Proverb In Here Somewhere

  1. #1
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    There's A Chinese Proverb In Here Somewhere

    So I was taking out the trash the other afternoon and while doing so saw a very pretty woman near my age walking down the alley with a malamute.

    (Okay, folks keep blowing me guff over the identity of the various arctic dog breeds. This was a large, light gray and white "german shepard" with a curly tail.)

    Anywho, as I was watching her leave I saw a rather interesting tableau.

    My neighbor's chihuahua, who is ballsy out of all proportion to his size, found a way to escape his yard by going through a hole in the screening of one of those low rectangular vents in the garage.

    Launched his himself and bit the malamute on the right buttock and hung on. This of course was utterly shocking to the larger dog, and after a second of stunned disbelief he was a furious whirlwind.

    The chihuahua was unbelievable. The only reason he is still alive was the 'mute started spinning to the left and the smaller dog, hanging on to the larger dogs right buttock, was just a little too short for him to grasp the smaller dog. If he had spun in the other direction he would have crushed the chihuahua like a bug.

    The chihuahua meanwhile, is in the "flying dog" position with his front legs folded, his ears flapping in the breeze, his tiny backside mere millimeters from a ravening toothstudded meat processor. And I kid thee not, the chihuahua was smiling!

    The only reason the chihuahua lived, much less escaped all injury was the woman, after taking a bit longer than Fido in overcoming her surprise, began giving the dog commands in German that I recognize as that really expensive program that german shepards are put through as a worthiness to breed thing in some countries. The name escapes me at the moment.

    The malamute must have earned his degree. The chihuahua had dropped off his butt finally and the malimute had the light of bloody murder in his eyes, I kid thee not!

    The lady gave one command, the 'mute really, really didn't want to hear it and the lady repeated it with a tug and damned if she didn't locked his heels!

    The malimute was so angry it was trembling! And she got it to heel and walked it down the alley close to her leg. But there was no way in hell she was physically restraining that dog. The malimute was walking all stiff like it was in a trance and twice it did a slow motion look over its shoudler at the chihuahua who had stayed near his garage.

    When they were out of sight the chihuahua trotted back to his hole in the screen and I swear the darn dog was chuckling!

    He won the fight!

  2. #2
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    There's A Chinese Proverb In Here Somewhere
    Let's see, the chihuahua is the terrorists, the malamute is the USA, the lady is the elite effete snobs, BigDon is Rush Limbaugh. Is that close?

    No, wait, I have a better one: When the big dog turns left, the small dog bites the right cheek.
    Last edited by hhEb09'1; 2008-Jun-22 at 04:59 PM. Reason: polished aphorism

  3. #3
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    "Ren off medications again."

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by bigdon
    There's A Chinese Proverb In Here Somewhere
    Turn the other cheek!
    Size is no guarantee of strength!
    Ninja chihuahua ! kicks butt (or bites in this case)

  5. #5
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    If biting large butt, smile and hang on for the ride of your life.

  6. #6
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    Size doesn't matter.

  7. #7
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    Re: There's A Chinese Proverb In Here Somewhere

    Confucius say: Little dog "chew", big dog go "Wah wah!"

  8. #8
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    "Before you beat a dog, find out who its master is."
    Source: (Chinese)

  9. #9
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    why have a dog and bark yourself!

  10. #10
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    It is not the size of the teeth, but the place the teeth are applied, that measures success.

  11. #11
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    dog thoughts:

    *wheres that spring board gone*

    chihuahua," should have gone to spec savers".

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by sarongsong View Post
    "Before you beat a dog, find out who its master is."
    Source: (Chinese)
    Nice one Sarong!

  13. #13
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    Re: There's A Chinese Proverb In Here Somewhere

    Quote Originally Posted by mike alexander View Post
    Size doesn't matter.
    Yeah, and a wallet is just as good as a briefcase.

  14. #14
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    or it could be " its bite is worse than its bark"

  15. #15
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    "Big dogs have little dogs
    Upon their butts to bite 'em.
    And the little dogs have lesser dogs,
    And so on ad infinitum."

  16. #16
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    AH! but the flea has the last laugh.

  17. #17
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    Mike, superchihuahua weighs 7 pounds. He has an adorable little "wife" that weighs four and a half. Her coloration makes her look like a polymorphed doberman with a lightbulb-shaped head. She bites him on the ears when he tries to eat her food and he runs away.

    I had to tell my neighbor he had a hole in the screen and his dog was getting out. It was attacking other dogs since I posted. Then retreat through the hole before the response could organize. His little "wife" had started to follow him on these sorties.

    There was mastiff and St. Bernard body parts everywhere!

    Actually the lady of the house almost had a heart attack when I told her what was happening. The man of the house is a not very friendly Spainard (or Portuguese) fisherman. Right out of central casting I might add. Very old school. One could say he was crotchety. But I'm sure his wife saw to repairs being done. Since its done.

  18. #18
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    wonder who the little beast is going to attack now!

  19. #19
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    You know what "they" say:

    They always kill their masters!

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigDon View Post
    ...superchihuahua weighs 7 pounds. He has an adorable little "wife"...the lady of the house almost had a heart attack when I told her what was happening. The man of the house is...out of central casting...one could say he was crotchety...
    as in, say, chihuahua?

  21. #21
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    Ah, so you are saying that the pets imitate the old couple. Or I guess I did.

  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by chrissy View Post
    wonder who the little beast is going to attack now!
    Hee-hee, just wait til he figures out who turned him in!

  23. #23
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    animals do take on a likeness to their owners and vice versa!

    don't think BD is scared of a lil dog or its owner, it's the women who are worse!

    hummmm! hope he does set the wife on him!

  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by hhEb09'1 View Post
    Let's see, the chihuahua is the terrorists, the malamute is the USA, the lady is the elite effete snobs, BigDon is Rush Limbaugh. Is that close?

    No, wait, I have a better one: When the big dog turns left, the small dog bites the right cheek.
    Good God hhEb!

    I wish I was clever enough to have intentionally come up with that as a political statement, but honestly, it was a unbelievably lucky small dog biting a big dog on the butt and getting away with it due to unique circumstance!

    <sigh> I'm digging my hole deeper aren't I?

  25. #25
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    Sometimes a dog is more capable when he is bigger than his opponent.
    He can hurt small dogs easily . It's an advantage.



  26. #26
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    Yes whirlpool, that's usually the case and why this diserved comment I thought.

  27. #27
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    I think it was one of Heinlein's characters who said "If combativeness was the sole survival characteristic, the Chihuahua would rule the Earth".

  28. #28
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    BigDon stories are a daily pleasantry for me.

  29. #29
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    Our former downstairs neighbor has an anti-chiuahua. It looks like one, weighs about 3 pounds, if that, and loves people. it doesn't do that "cower and shake" thing most others do.

    The GF's sister has a little farm type house with ducks and chickens running loose. The GF went down there with the friend and the "Chi-wi" the other day to let it chase ducks. It loves this and will run itself to the point of exhaustion. Then it went after a chicken. The chicken ran behind a bush with the dog hot on it's tail. And instant later, the dog came streaking out followed very closely by the angry hen.

    He was back after it a moment later. We've also pulled about 5 claws out of him, 3 from his face, from the times he's tried to "play" with the GF's cat. 16 pounds of seething anger and pointy bits.

    Not a proverb, but "sometimes it's better to be lucky than good" comes to mind.
    I'm Not Evil.
    An evil person would do the things that pop into my head.

  30. #30
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    Re: There's A Chinese Proverb In Here Somewhere

    Many men eat, but few men chew.

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