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Thread: I suddenly exist

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
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    I suddenly exist

    I wonder anyone with children and or a family would understand this. I am invisible in my household, like a ghostly presence that occassionally makes itself known. That is, of course, unless I am taking a shower. When everyone else involves themselves into their own thing, I do mine. If I am doing something that requires little attention or allows the ability to walk away with ease (playing on the computer or watching television, idle stuff) It doesn't matter, they need or want nothing from me. I get a new book, do everything I can to respectably consider myself done for the day, excited to begin my new book, suddenly everyone wants a piece of me.

    My oldest asks if I can watch a movie with her. I can't turn that down, her desire for my presence has been so low I have to jump at the chance to spend time with her. Holes is a cute movie btw, a little long but alright.

    Bedtime is creeping up and I can soon have my time. Nope, my youngest grabs a book from my room, get this "The complete works of Edgar Allen Poe," and asks me to read some poems. Yeah, my 7, closer to 8 yr old wants me to read Poe. What kind of a moron would turn that down? Naturally she picks The Raven, goodness knows she couldn't pick something short.

    With that done, I grab my book and a drink...woops! hubby comes out, "Wanna do something? Maybe watcha movie?" You're kidding right? On any other night, once the kids go to bed, the only way I can have a conversation with him is through guild chat on World of Warcraft. Another movie? How about some poker? Nope can't find the deck of cards, sick of video games, nothing on tv, I guess let's watch a movie. The Invasion was so/so, too much propaganda if you ask me. Never the less, I never got to read my book . I just have to ask why? Is this a typical behavior thing?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
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    Yep. Family life

    And I thought I had it rough

    It's just my son and I and a pesky housemate.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
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    3,974
    With mine it's sports. In the last 2 weeks we've had 6 basketball practices, 2 all day Saturday basketball meets (I coach), 2 volleyball practices (I coach), one half-day baseball hitting camp (got to meet and hang out with Joe Mauer for a bit), one half-day sprinters camp, attended one varsity basketball game as spectators, and done the drop-off & pick-up for 2 Girl Scout meetings.

    Sometimes I don't know which end is up - but it is better than some of the alternatives I see playing themselves out. And we do not force any of it; all voluntary on their part.

    EDIT: Forgot to mention we also got in a nice 6 hour session of downhill when the temperatures spiked above 20F the other day.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
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    Paris, France
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    I live with 3 other guys. It's pretty much free for all.
    My travel blog Currently about living in Europe with many older blog posts about riding a motorcycle across the US and Europe.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
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    I see the same phenomenon in the Tech support field as well. Callers come in waves. Unpredictable, and peculiar. Oh, there are times when you can count on increased call volume... just before lunch, just after lunch, and just before normal close of business... but there are times when it is quiet, and BOOM! Dozens of calls in queue, followed by lots of frantic techs working quickly, then followed by an eerie silence. I've seen many of these waves, and the ones I call waves, the calls are not all about one item, like an outage. It's just the randomness of people, is all.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
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    closetgeek, when family members make demands on your time, I think it's perfectly OK to say "I would love to, but right now this is me time", every once in a while. It sounds like you work really hard (maybe too hard) to live on their schedule, which could have the unfortunate side-effect of them forgetting that you have your own interests and needs.

  7. #7
    Join Date
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mister Earl View Post
    I see the same phenomenon in the Tech support field as well. Callers come in waves. Unpredictable, and peculiar. Oh, there are times when you can count on increased call volume... just before lunch, just after lunch, and just before normal close of business... but there are times when it is quiet, and BOOM! Dozens of calls in queue, followed by lots of frantic techs working quickly, then followed by an eerie silence. I've seen many of these waves, and the ones I call waves, the calls are not all about one item, like an outage. It's just the randomness of people, is all.
    That happens in my line of work too. I've had many-a-day where 7.5 of the 8 hours was completely dead. No calls. No walk-in payments. No e-mails. Nothing. But then as soon as one person walks in, both phone lines light up and before you can answer there's a line of 2 or 3 additional people walking through the door.

    The annoying part is the more people that come flooding in at once, the more involved and complex each individual need seems to be. Makes me miss my days as a rent-a-cop on a no-longer-used 50 acre 15 building complex. Patrol once every two hours. Tv, reading, drawing, whatever for the rest of the time. Oddly, the unskilled, undemanding job didn't pay to well though...

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mister Earl View Post
    I see the same phenomenon in the Tech support field as well. Callers come in waves. Unpredictable, and peculiar. Oh, there are times when you can count on increased call volume... just before lunch, just after lunch, and just before normal close of business... but there are times when it is quiet, and BOOM! Dozens of calls in queue, followed by lots of frantic techs working quickly, then followed by an eerie silence. I've seen many of these waves, and the ones I call waves, the calls are not all about one item, like an outage. It's just the randomness of people, is all.
    When I worked Tech Support, we would make bets as to the waves.
    We had to stop eventually because the complete lack of predictability left us all disgruntled.

  9. #9
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    Oct 2007
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    Newton Aycliffe. UK.
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    it's a normal thing in many households, to be wanted when you are wanting to do something for yourself, i try to have me time but it doesnt work all the time and i think if i was constantly ignored i would complain more!
    with your two daughters why dont you have a book reading night for an hour or so? my daughter likes reading a book when im reading its our quiet moment together!we get cosy on the settee (sofa) a drink something to nibble on and away we go. give it a go it might work out!
    The real art of conversation is not only saying the right thing at the right moment but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the most tempting moment. -- unknown

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