MOST UNEXPECTED THEOLOGICAL DISCOVERY
After years of research and analysis, Rev. Larry Bird of French Lick, Indiana, has determined that God looks exactly like L. Ron Hubbard. "I was as surprised as anyone," he said. "I always assumed He looked like Jeffry Hunter, but there you go."
Rev. Bird noted that the resemblance was just pure coincidence, and that Mr. Hubbard was not God. Whether God is a Scientologist or not remains obscure.