What's the worst SF book you've read? (or tried to read)

[Noclevername]

I've read some movie novelizations that were pretty awful, it's clear that many were rushed into publication.

...I wonder if they've novelized any Uwe Boll films? Those would truly be some books to avoid.

[John Mendenhall]

Chariots of the Gods.

Should catapult into first on every thinking person's list.

[snowcelt]

Should catapult into first on every thinking person's list.

Agreed!

However there are some close seconds. Every time I take a stab at reading a franchise novel (Star Trek, Warhammer 40,000, Deathlands, etc.,) I start to rubberneck after the second page---slobber begins to pool on me chin by the third page. I have to stop after that.

[primummobile]

Should catapult into first on every thinking person's list.

That's more fantasy than sci fi.

[starcanuck64]

Speaking of books that one has tried to read multiple times but just can't....

I loved David Brin's first three "Uplift" books: Sundiver, Startide Rising, and The Uplift War. I have tried at least 4 or 5 times to read the first book of the next trilogy, Brightness Reef, and I just can't. I get maybe 50 or 60 pages in and it is just so terrible, and plodding and written from too many different characters' perspectives that I can't continue. I just can't get myself to care enough to read it.

Sadly I agree.

[Noclevername]

That's more fantasy than sci fi.

It's a dreckumentary.

[Swift]

In my childhood and teen years I read just about all the big name books of classic science fiction (at least up to that time - 1960s), but there are a couple I just never read, for whatever reason.

Recently, I decided to read Clarke's Childhood's End, which I've always heard is a classic. Well, I don't know why it is so considered; I thought it was OK at best, and I only finished it to see what happens. I also found it rather depressing. Rather sorry I even bothered to read it.

[captain swoop]

I loved David Brin's first three "Uplift" books: Sundiver, Startide Rising, and The Uplift War. I have tried at least 4 or 5 times to read the first book of the next trilogy, Brightness Reef, and I just can't. I get maybe 50 or 60 pages in and it is just so terrible, and plodding and written from too many different characters' perspectives that I can't continue. I just can't get myself to care enough to read it.

Like Moorcocks follow on trilogy for the Prince Corum Swords trilogy and Michael Scott Rohans follow on trilogy to the Winter of the World trilogy.

Some authors don't know when to quit while they are ahead.

[primummobile]

In my childhood and teen years I read just about all the big name books of classic science fiction (at least up to that time - 1960s), but there are a couple I just never read, for whatever reason.

Recently, I decided to read Clarke's Childhood's End, which I've always heard is a classic. Well, I don't know why it is so considered; I thought it was OK at best, and I only finished it to see what happens. I also found it rather depressing. Rather sorry I even bothered to read it.

That makes me sad. It was to be my next book.

[starcanuck64]

I also found Childhoods End depressing. It was well written and interesting but there's something about man joining some kind of hive mind that left me feeling empty at the end.

[Nowhere Man]

Here's one that probably none of us have read:

Our final item is the second in the science fiction series published by Greenberg, Publisher: "The Green Men of Graypec" by Festus Pragnell (185pp., $2.50), a novel about which one can only say that it probably would have been better left in the quiet obscurity of the pulps where it first appeared. Following as it does Ted Sturgeon's fascinating "Dreaming Jewels" (see GALAXY for November 1950), the comedown is all the more painful.

Fred

[captain swoop]

'From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.' -Groucho

[SeanF]

'From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.' -Groucho

I don't remember who said (wrote) it, but I've always liked, "I am sitting in the smallest room in my house with your book in front of me. Soon it will be behind me."

[banquo's_bumble_puppy]

The Zap Gun by Philip K. Dick...oddly the concept was good...but just too hyper....reflective of what he was into at the time me thinks...he should have done a rewrite.

[Swift]

'From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.' -Groucho

I might have to infract myself for derailing the thread, but the other Groucho book quote from I like is “Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”

[swampyankee]

We could have a long, very productive thread of Groucho quotes. Time to find a copies of Duck Soup, At the Races, and all his other movies. And his TV show....

[Solfe]

Yes, conversely for me too. I'm half afraid to read the third trilogy in case I hate it.

I started reading it but there is a bit about Hot Wheels cars... except the author is trying so hard not to say or describe Hot Wheels Cars and Track. It is actually very distracting. The author was trying to make it sound like a character was obsessive compulsive about the cars and track, but missed by a lot.

I was working at Mattel at the time and knew exactly how weird people can be when playing with toys:

Caller: "Hey, I was told that your phone agents can't sell me 14,080 pieces of 9" track. Why not?"
Me: "Where do you think we would keep 2 miles track in our warehouse?"
Caller: "I have two miles of track in my garage. Can I send you pictures?"

[redshifter]

The Gripping Hand. Which is not, incidentally, gripping. The first part's like a "where are they now" of a few of the characters from the first book, then they introduce a bunch of new ones and attempt to generate artificial tension. It isn't horrible, but it's slow.

I'm finally almost done with this book after reading a page here n' there when I have a free moment. This books starts with a whimper and leaves with a fizzle...

[DancesWithFruitBats]

never got Gormenghast.

[parallaxicality]

No one's mentioned Gor yet? The woman who recommended them to me (after seeing me read Foundation) is now in a mental institution. I think that sums up their literary power.

Also, does Meg count? That has to be the only book I have ever successfully sped-read in a supermarket checkout line.

[HenrikOlsen]

never got Gormenghast.

I haven't tried reading it yet, but I really liked the BBC miniseries. Its casting was inspired and included the casting of Britain's only known tame albino rook as Master Chalk.

[Paul Beardsley]

No one's mentioned Gor yet? The woman who recommended them to me (after seeing me read Foundation) is now in a mental institution. I think that sums up their literary power.

I think John Norman's work is generally considered to be beneath lists of any kind.

[HenrikOlsen]

I think John Norman's work is generally considered to be beneath lists of any kind.

It would probably have to be a list which also includes E. L. James (Erika Leonard) and A. N. Roquelaure (Anne Rice).

[parallaxicality]

I dunno. True, those books were idiot soup with stupidity croutons but I still liked Interview With the Vampire

[HenrikOlsen]

Wrong series.
It's her Sleeping Beauty books that lands her on that list.

[KaiYeves]

I dunno. True, those books were idiot soup with stupidity croutons but I still liked Interview With the Vampire

I should start using that one...

[Paul Beardsley]

I should start using that one...

Me too...

...Served with a moron ladle.

[ToSeek]

never got Gormenghast.

My wife tried to read it after we watched the miniseries but gave up. I stuck it out. I can understand why people with vastly more patience than me might like it, but it definitely wasn't my cup of tea.

[Solfe]

I dunno. True, those books were idiot soup with stupidity croutons but I still liked Interview With the Vampire

I seem to recall Spike from Buffy the Vampire slayer enjoying the Interview series not for the writing but for that fact that if he acted like the characters, his victims let their guard down.

I am looking at Fritz Lebrer's The Sinful Ones. There are some remarkably dated things in that book. I like it, but it isn't the best.

[HenrikOlsen]

I'm in this not really happy situation where it's obvious that people who don't know about the books have no idea what I'm talking about and discussing other books by the author means the point has been missed completely.

Plus I really don't want to try to explain because an explanation is likely to get very close to a rules violation.

Oh well, I'll explain by PM for those curious who don't know what I mean.