The first words the Earl uttered when he stepped out onto the martian soil were, "I can't believe it's not Buttercup!"
Order of Kilopi
The first words the Earl uttered when he stepped out onto the martian soil were, "I can't believe it's not Buttercup!"
So many bugs, so little time.
Established Member
Bars on Mars sell beer by the vase but so far no Mars Bars. A Mars vase jar of beer's on a par with tar, so stay home.
Order of Kilopi
On second thought, never mind. Let's test it, shall we? Hey I've just invented a time machine!
STARGAZING: All I see are the lights of a billion places I'll never go. --Howard Tayler, Schlock Mercenary
Order of Kilopi
Order of Kilopi
I'm looking forward and backward to that!
STARGAZING: All I see are the lights of a billion places I'll never go. --Howard Tayler, Schlock Mercenary
Established Member
Unfortunately Nobel was killed as a child by a falling chunk of glassy metal broken off a Ford Time Transit Waggon. All the prizes were withdrawn in an implosion of etimanyd.
Order of Kilopi
Established Member
Phew, just in time a time traveller came back and shot the inventor (sorry noclevername) just before he made the invention and all we have now is a puff of future smoke and a rumour. It's funny but it keeps happening, what is going on?
Order of Kilopi
Oh, that was me that shot me. I wanted to paradox myself-- all the cool kids are doing it!
STARGAZING: All I see are the lights of a billion places I'll never go. --Howard Tayler, Schlock Mercenary
Honored Member
The words to Simon and Garfunkel's "Scarborough Fair" are really encoded equations for time travel.
Order of Kilopi
Order of Kilopi
And if you play the song backwards, you'll hear the recipe for award-winning peanut butter fudge (Miss Emily Watkins, Blue Prize Winner, Kansas State Fair 1889).Originally Posted by mike alexander
Established Member
If you play Have You Been to Scarborough Fair real fast, it tells you where their time machine was hidden ... so I went there and discovered its batteries are not included.
Administrator
The Cleveland Indians have just won their 19th World Series in a row.
Order of Kilopi
Order of Kilopi
Al Pacino was going to record "Scarface Fair," as a satire (ala Weird Al Yankovich) of Simon & Garfunkle's "Scarborough Fair," but when Michelle Pfeiffer refused to duet with him, Pacino dropped the idea.
Ironically, Sylvesterone Stallone WAS willing to duet the song with Pacino.
Order of Kilopi
It's manually-powered. You have to turn the crank.
STARGAZING: All I see are the lights of a billion places I'll never go. --Howard Tayler, Schlock Mercenary
Order of Kilopi
Order of Kilopi
"As The Crank Turns" is a popular soap opera about ATM theoretical physicists.
STARGAZING: All I see are the lights of a billion places I'll never go. --Howard Tayler, Schlock Mercenary
Established Member
The Earl of the Martian Marsh has sent his own personal space craft to bring Buttercup to Mars this year, well before the 2015 manned trip.
Order of Kilopi
Order of Kilopi
The above post was not at all supposed to go under Worst New Products.
STARGAZING: All I see are the lights of a billion places I'll never go. --Howard Tayler, Schlock Mercenary
Established Member
The American government is going to spend a trillion dollar stimulus by giving a bit over $3,000 to everybody in America, for Halloween: the world's biggest treat.
Order of Kilopi
Order of Kilopi
In Soviet Russia, virus catches you!
STARGAZING: All I see are the lights of a billion places I'll never go. --Howard Tayler, Schlock Mercenary
Administrator
Starting Tuesday, I will be posting lots and lots for the following 10 days.
Order of Kilopi
Order of Kilopi
Untrue facts are the ones most likely to be believed.
STARGAZING: All I see are the lights of a billion places I'll never go. --Howard Tayler, Schlock Mercenary
Administrator
You have to clap your hands really hard if you want Untrue Facts to stay untrue.
Order of Kilopi
Welcome back to BAUT, Swift. Hopefully the next 10 days will make up for your notable lack of posts of late.
Last edited by ABR.; 2011-Oct-31 at 06:54 PM.
So many bugs, so little time.
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