Films of 2011

[parallaxicality]

Some movies out this week that Gillian might find interesting.

Anonymous: Roland Emmerich is often called the "Master of Disaster", but if one views his work in its entirety, it would be fairer to describe him as the "King of Conspiracy". Nearly every film he's ever made has touched on conspiracy in one way or another: from his thesis film The Noah's Ark Principle (Cold War paranoia) to Moon 44 (multinational corporate subterfuge), Universal Soldier (government experiments on soldiers) and Stargate (ancient astronauts); from Independence Day (Area 51) to The Day After Tomorrow (climate change denial), 10,000 BC (Grahame Hancockery), and finally, just to show he's with it, the conspiracy of the moment, 2012. A casual viewer might think it's strange that he's shifted from scifi to Tudor period piece, and limited his budget to "only" $30 million, but it makes sense when you realise that he's chosen the oldest and hoariest conspiracy of all: Shakespeare didn't write his plays! OK, so it goes against every conclusion of hundreds of years of legitimate scholarship, but who cares? It'll draw the crowds. On that score, perhaps Shakespeare himself would have approved. Why Derek Jakobi or Venessa Redgrave approved enough to star in this I cannot say.

All's Faire In Love: A two-year plus delay is never a good sign, but I have to say, the sight of Christina Ricci in Renassance Faire clothes went a long way toward winning over. One thing: Gillian, you know people didn't really talk like that in the Renaissance, right?

[Gillianren]

Anonymous . . . I think, based on the trailers, that I've figured out who they're claiming did write the plays, and while I find all anti-Stratfordian claims ludicrous, in this one, we have a winner. If I'm correct, the movie is claiming that the Earl of Essex wrote the things, and from what I can tell, he's about the only member of Elizabeth's court who didn't even write poetry. There are many, many interesting things about Robert Devereux. Indeed, there are interesting things about him in connection with Shakespeare, which may be where this comes from. And it's certainly true that he was that rarest of things, a member of Elizabeth's court actually executed for treason. So she was certainly mad enough at him to do a lot of things. But again, if I have the plot sorted, she wasn't that byzantine in her plotting. It also fails to explain the continued production of new Shakespearean plays after the earl's--and, indeed, Elizabeth's--death.

And, yes, I know. Even without watching the trailer, I'm sure I know. The way people talk at faire is not the same as the way they spoke in the actual Renaissance. I can come closer to actual English from the era than most people, but does anyone remember the struggle in trying to get high school students to understand the Shakespeare they had to learn for English class? Now consider doing that to people who haven't had those classes in literally decades.

ETA--I've just read the Roger Ebert review of Anonymous, and it goes with the much more prosaic selection of Edward de Vere, Earl of Oxford. And throws in hints at the idea that he was actually Elizabeth's son. It makes slightly more sense, but it still runs into chronology problems. And, yes, Roger's a firm Stratfordian, showing more sense than he did when it came to JFK.

[HenrikOlsen]

But again, if I have the plot sorted, she wasn't that byzantine in her plotting.

One might pin the byzantine plotting on Walsingham though, he did make a couple of beauties in the line of plots.

And he was incidentally the father-in-law of Robert Devereux, 2nd Earl of Essex whom you mentioned.

[Gillianren]

True on both counts. I recently read a book about controversial royal marriages which actually took him at his word regarding the conspiracy which led to the death of Mary Stuart, proving the author hadn't done enough research. Then again, she also claimed that Guildford Dudley, husband of Lady Jane Grey, was the son of John Seymour. Which just looking at their last names should prove wrong, but what do I know?

[Jim]

Wrong side of the sheets?

[Gillianren]

John Dudley, Guildford's father (also father of Elizabeth's favourite, Robert Dudley), was deadly political rivals with John Seymour, whose sister had been Jane and who therefore was King Edward's uncle.

[Doodler]

In any case, the trailers make it look dreadful, with Milla Jovovich playing Every Milla Jovovich Character Ever (just like how Jason Statham plays Every Jason Statham Character Ever if you look at his recent films). Why is it that Hollywood can't seem to make a good "Three Musketeers" film in recent years?

The last decent 3M movie I can recall had Jeremy Irons, Gerard Depardeau, and John Malkovitch in the roles. The Man in the Iron Mask may not be the best one ever made, overall, but I did enjoy their characterizations of the trio.