The philosopher's side of the debate reminds me of the sort of thing you talk about in the dorms at two in the morning. It sounds all powerful and deep, and then you wake up the next morning and realize it wasn't. The question works for bacteria, but not for something which doesn't just reproduce by cell division.
"Now everyone was giving her that kind of look UFOlogists get when they suddenly say, 'Hey, if you shade your eyes you can see it is just a flock of geese after all.'"
"You can't erase icing."
"I can't believe it doesn't work! I found it on the internet, man!"