Dilbert's Salary Theorem

[Kaptain K]

I thought others might enjoy this:

Dilbert's "Salary Theorem" states that "Engineers and scientists can never earn as much as business executives and sales people."

This theorem can now be supported by a mathematical equation based on the following two postulates:

As every engineer knows: Power = Work/Time

Since:

Knowledge = Power
Time = Money
Therefore:
Knowledge = Work/Money.

Solving for Money, we get:

Money = Work/Knowledge.

Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of work done.

Conclusion:

The less you know, the more you make.

[Onlooker]

I always wondered why engineers and scientists make more money than the people who work at McDonald\'s. Now I know.

[Swift]

:lol:

I didn't know cartoon characters made any money at all! :D

[Neverfly]

I always wondered why engineers and scientists make more money than the people who work at McDonald\'s. Now I know.

With the Customer Service we are getting from McDonalds these days, I am surprised they are paid at all.

[Swift]

With the Customer Service we are getting from McDonalds these days, I am surprised they are paid at all.
I don't know, I think the service is ok, as long as you don't pay for a $4.26 order by handing the clerk $5.01. The food, on the other hand... :sick:

[jfribrg]

Money = Work/Knowledge.

Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of work done.


Based on this other thread (http://www.bautforum.com/off-topic-babbling/51735-what-does-zero-times-infinity-equal.html#post896328), this is only true when work is not zero. We need to use L'hopital's rule, but to do that we need to know the rate at which work and knowledge change. Since work = mass * displacement or mv^2/2, the derivative is mass * velocity, so the fatter you are the more work you do (and also the more water you displace when you take your coworker's advice to go jump in a lake). To answer the question, all we need to know is what d(knowledge)/dt is. Any suggestions?

[Tobin Dax]

I don't know, I think the service is ok, as long as you don't pay for a $4.26 order by handing the clerk $5.01. The food, on the other hand... :sick:

I did a new one last week: I gave the clerk $20.50 for an order that was around $5.25. That threw her for a loop. Then again, so did the time I wanted however many dollars and fifty cents back. :D

[SeanF]

I did a new one last week: I gave the clerk $20.50 for an order that was around $5.25. That threw her for a loop.
Throws me for a loop, too. You had a fifty-cent piece? Ooh, four dimes and two nickels?

EDIT: Oh, around $5.25. Never mind. :)

[Tobin Dax]

Throws me for a loop, too. You had a fifty-cent piece? Ooh, four dimes and two nickels?

EDIT: Oh, around $5.25. Never mind. :)

Yeah, it was $5 and change. I wanted a ten and a five back, so I gave her twenty and more change. (Couldn't think of a good way to say that above.)

[fotobits]

I sent this to some friends, and one replied "Solving for the inverse, I must be a genius."

[Tobin Dax]

I sent this to some friends, and one replied "Solving for the inverse, I must be a genius."
That sounds like a corollary to this theroem: "Based on their salaries, bosses think they're geniuses."

[DyerWolf]

Work & Life balance...

Ask most people if they'd rather take a job that pays $80,000/yr salary or a job that pays $65,000/yr, and I will bet most would opt for the $80,000. In some cases, that would be a mistake.

If you were to analyze the two jobs and see that the person making $80,000 gets two weeks vacation and is expected to work 50 hours per week, minimum, whereas the person making $65,000 is expected to work 40 hours per week (also with two weeks vacation), guess who makes more per hour?

I guess one gets to spend more money on things; the other gets to spend more time with his or her family.

Question: which is the better value?

Next question: How much do you pay your plumber, electrician or auto-mechanic per hour?

Finally: who has a more stressful job?


(I wonder what Scott Adams would say about this?)

[Larry Jacks]

Ask most people if they'd rather take a job that pays $80,000/yr salary or a job that pays $65,000/yr, and I will bet most would opt for the $80,000. In some cases, that would be a mistake.

If you were to analyze the two jobs and see that the person making $80,000 gets two weeks vacation and is expected to work 50 hours per week, minimum, whereas the person making $65,000 is expected to work 40 hours per week (also with two weeks vacation), guess who makes more per hour?

It depends on the jobs. Are they salaried (meaning you're expected to work overtime without additional pay) or hourly? I've had relatively low paying salaried jobs and currently work at a higher paying hourly job. I don't get time and a half for hours above 40 per week but I do get straight time. That's a lot better than salaried, I can assure you. I also get 25 days of paid time off and 10 holidays a year. That comes from staying with the company for almost 13 years.

Next question: How much do you pay your plumber, electrician or auto-mechanic per hour?

Finally: who has a more stressful job?

Most of the time, when you pay for work by a plumber, electrician, or auto-mechanic, you're paying the shop rate. Unless you're hiring the worker directly, they're only making a fraction of that rate. A mechanic working in a shop that charges $75 an hour might only be making $20 or less depending on the shop. However, I've known and hired good workers like the ones you mentioned and paid them accordingly.

It just goes to show that you don't necessarily need a college education to make a good living. You need marketable job skills. I've known high school drop outs who went on to become masters at a trade. My brother Steve comes to mind. He's a master machinist and welder. He makes a very good living and earned it. I've also known college grads who have a degree and no skills to speak of. They're not doing so well.

[HenrikOlsen]

I've had 5 years of living for about the same per month as a high school kid would get working full time in a minimum wage job.
The difference was that I get that for working 2 days in that month, as an IT-consultant and I get to goof off for the rest of the time doing whatever I want.
I've also done full time at the same hourly rate, grossing $21000+ in a month.
I definitely prefer the former.

[tbm]

..........
The less you know, the more you make.

So how come I ain't rich??

tbm

[Occam]

:lol:

I didn't know cartoon characters made any money at all! :D
Tell that to Garfield and Snoopy

[Hydro]

I thought others might enjoy this:

Conclusion:

The less you know, the more you make.

This post reminded me of the discovery I read a few years ago of the heaviest element known to science, Administratium (http://www.officefunnies.com/administratium.html).

[Kaptain K]

:lol: Funny! :lol:

[Swift]

This Dilbert (http://www.news-herald.com/site/news.cfm?dept_id=21849&PAG=461&newsid=19258322) is paid in vegetables and crackers. He doesn't work real hard, but he did have to get up before dawn the other day.

(this is from the park system I volunteer with)

[farmerjumperdon]

Work & Life balance...

Ask most people if they'd rather take a job that pays $80,000/yr salary or a job that pays $65,000/yr, and I will bet most would opt for the $80,000. In some cases, that would be a mistake.

If you were to analyze the two jobs and see that the person making $80,000 gets two weeks vacation and is expected to work 50 hours per week, minimum, whereas the person making $65,000 is expected to work 40 hours per week (also with two weeks vacation), guess who makes more per hour?


I made just such a career choice to make at about the time our first daughter was born. 60 to 70 hours per week, including intrusion on evenings and weekends; versus 35 hours per week for a bit less money and the opportunity to be Superdad. It was a no-brainer.

And I got to keep my 26 vacation days per year.

[DyerWolf]

A: what do you do?

B: do you need an assistant?

:lol:

Seriously, that is a challenge I am facing right now. I stand to walk away from a very prestigious, well paying job into the great unknown. Freaks my wife out and admittedly makes me a bit nervous. There are a great many opportunities to take another job with 50+hour expectations with less pay.:doh:

There is a possibility of my taking a job in the field of the heavy element noted above - that I'm pretty sure only requires 40/wk on average (more during the semesters, lighter during the summers). It pays less, yet it does retain the prestige... - but there is a state-mandated hiring freeze.:mad:

I can't tell you how many people look down on someone who only wants to work 40 hrs/wk - or consider that part-time in my profession. In many ways I wish it were I who had our kid instead of my wife - then I could easily justify working a reduced schedule. (Several female professionals I work with have been able to negotiate a modified or reduced schedule that I don't think would be extended to (or respected if asked for) male professionals who requested the same opportunities.

Odd, isn't it that women have made great strides in gaining equality and reshaping the American workforce - and now men are starting to recognize an inequality in treatment / expectation?*



*I recognize that female remuneration and opportunity still fall short of equality - but I think it is a good thing that the increasing influence of women in the workforce is reshaping this 'landscape.' Parity is on its way, IMO for the betterment of all.

[Neverfly]

A: what do you do?

B: do you need an assistant?

:lol:

Seriously, that is a challenge I am facing right now. I stand to walk away from a very prestigious, well paying job into the great unknown. Freaks my wife out and admittedly makes me a bit nervous. There are a great many opportunities to take another job with 50+hour expectations with less pay.:doh:

There is a possibility of my taking a job in the field of the heavy element noted above - that I'm pretty sure only requires 40/wk on average (more during the semesters, lighter during the summers). It pays less, yet it does retain the prestige... - but there is a state-mandated hiring freeze.:mad:

I can't tell you how many people look down on someone who only wants to work 40 hrs/wk - or consider that part-time in my profession. In many ways I wish it were I who had our kid instead of my wife - then I could easily justify working a reduced schedule. (Several female professionals I work with have been able to negotiate a modified or reduced schedule that I don't think would be extended to (or respected if asked for) male professionals who requested the same opportunities.

Odd, isn't it that women have made great strides in gaining equality and reshaping the American workforce - and now men are starting to recognize an inequality in treatment / expectation?*



*I recognize that female remuneration and opportunity still fall short of equality - but I think it is a good thing that the increasing influence of women in the workforce is reshaping this 'landscape.' Parity is on its way, IMO for the betterment of all.

You had started a thread on this hadn't you?

[DyerWolf]

Yes:shifty:, and farmerjumperdon answered my questions there. I'm still admiringly jealous.




Its like a loose tooth. I just can't stop messing with it.

[Neverfly]

Yes:shifty:, and farmerjumperdon answered my questions there. I'm still admiringly jealous.




Its like a loose tooth. I just can't stop messing with it.

Oh, I was wondering if there were any updates.

DyerWolf; CEO.

[DyerWolf]

Link (http://www.danieldrezner.com/archives/bitter.gif)
mor lin'q (http://static.flickr.com/29/51803829_90848bd55a_o.gif)
Silently Screaming (http://www.randomhouse.com/pantheon/graphicnovels/workhell_2.html)

Welcome to my world (http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.randomhouse.com/pantheon/graphicnovels/art/workhellspread2.gif&imgrefurl=http://www.randomhouse.com/pantheon/graphicnovels/workhell_4.html&h=930&w=598&sz=138&hl=en&start=4&um=1&tbnid=D97UUku3tbAkiM:&tbnh=147&tbnw=95&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dwork%2Bis%2Bhell%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den)*

... and finally with a nod to the OP

Missing link (http://i8.photobucket.com/albums/a14/mpeter71/Dilbert.jpg)



*Seriously, Matt Groening is one of my fave's.